This week’s blog post is for all the moms and dads who put too much on themselves when it comes to what happens to their children. As a parent myself, I understand. Our kids are our greatest responsibility, and when they get into trouble, all we want to do is help them out of it. It’s natural. However, there are certain things that happen to our kids that are simply not our fault as parents.
I recently went out to the jail to consult with a potential new client. He was arrested, and his family was looking to hire a lawyer to defend him. After the consult, I spoke with the potential client’s mother, and she was in shambles. It turns out that her son got arrested by the fugitive task force camped outside their home for a few days. She asked her son if he recognized the vehicle parked outside their home, and when the son said he did not, he figured he would go out and see how he could help the people in the vehicle. Of course, as soon as they learned his name, they arrested him pursuant to a warrant he was completely oblivious about. She figured that had she not pointed the vehicle out to her son, he would not have gone out and gotten arrested.
When I spoke to this potential client’s mom, I could feel the guilt and remorse just oozing out of her. I assured her that her son was going to get arrested regardless and that the fact that he was arrested was in no way her fault. My heart went out to her.
Over the years, I have spoken to hundreds of parents of criminal defendants. I have met some who have completely written their child off, while I have met many more who would take their child’s place in a heartbeat. One of the greatest honors in my life is being able to witness the parental love my clients receive and be a voice of experience and reason, telling the parents to not punish themselves more than they already are.
Practical Advice for Parents
- Communicate Openly: Keep open lines of communication with your child. Encourage them to share their feelings and experiences with you without fear of judgment.
- Seek Professional Help: Consider seeking counseling or therapy for both yourself and your child. Professional guidance can help navigate the emotional turmoil and provide coping strategies.
- Educate Yourself: Learn about the legal process your child is going through. Understanding what to expect can reduce anxiety and help you provide better support.
- Find Support Groups: Join support groups for parents in similar situations. Sharing experiences and advice with others can be incredibly reassuring and helpful.
- Focus on Self-Care: Ensure you take care of your own physical and mental health. A healthy parent is better equipped to support their child through tough times.
If your child is caught up in the criminal system, few things can be scarier. A compassionate, understanding, and experienced attorney can make all the difference. Contact us today to talk about how we can help you or your child navigate the nightmare that is the criminal system.
